Billy Crystal and Bette Midler star in what could have been a decent comedy, if director Andy Fickman hadn't made it such a tearjerker. Billy and Bette — he a baseball announcer and she a former TV weather girl — don't see much of their daughter and three grandkids. When called upon to come and care for the brood, their old-school ways collide with a culture in which parental edicts have to be rationalized and kids get a trophy for just showing up. Predictable gags come from coping with new technology and scuttling the household's no-sweets policy. Crystal gets some good lines (when asked for "soy-sage" meat substitute, he says, "What're you, from da Bronx?") and Midler's warmth is infectious, but at the mere whiff of a serious emotion, the soundtrack makes with the poignant ivory-tickling and it's time to learn something about these people. You'll want to learn less about the kids' uptight mother (Marisa Tomei), who's given way too much screen time.