Alex Jones: Juice boxes are SO gay

Well, this brings a whole new meaning to the term fruit juice. Libertarian "paranoia porn" mongering radio host Alex Jones, who is not crazy at all, not one bit, knows where gay people come from. And it's not from Lady GaGa's sparkly, prosthetic lady-parts. Ahem. No, gay people, says Jones, come from juice boxes. So anybody who doesn't want to get all queer and smite god and stuff better stop sucking down those Capri Suns. Not to mention Juicy Juice...could that name even sound more gay? We bet he has some fun theories about what the mass consumption of sugary-fun Pixie Stix do to young heterosexual males. (Hint, it has something to do with Eunuchs.)