(Beware vegetarians, you will probably cry from this)

Not only have the stupid mud-bathing brats ruined my perfect beach-front vacation with my hubby who just got back from Iraq (and who planned a vowal renewal on the beach since he was deployed during our one-year-anniversary), but these silly coughing swines are killing Mexicans and getting little kids sick across the nation (not to mention freaking the world out in the process).

Mischa Barton pledges allegiance to bacon.

"Pigs are noble creatures, selflessly giving of their delectable flesh — and we need as many of them as we can get." Mike Miliard

Bacon could be plotting to take over pop culture. Bacon. BACON. BACON. Coming soon, a special photoshop story time of celebrities and bacon (IT'S HERE!).